Items removed from my garden this week:

6 footballs

1 saw

1 moving house sign

100 feet of chicken wire

I recently bought a flat with an 80-foot garden at the back. When I say ‘garden’, imagine ‘jungle’ and you’ll have the picture. In fact you have the picture right at the top of this page. On the left is the fairly accessible area outside the back bedroom, on the right, the chaos that lives behind the fence.

And when I say ’80-foot’ I’ve never actually measured it, mainly because there is no way to get through the tangle of brambles and weeds. There could be anything down there; living plants, oil wells, a family of bears. Though living plants are highly unlikely.

I couldn’t figure how the neighbours each side – both owners of finely trimmed gardens – had never complained about the state of ‘the garden’ to the former owners. Then I got a chance to visit the upstairs flat and take this picture. It looks strangely attractive from above – all green and lush and overhanging trees.

Anyway, this week I decided to tackle it. By paying a friend who ‘does gardens’ to take her strimmers and her life in her hands and venture in there.

After four hours work she sent me the above list of items removed. Along with about 12 bags of garden waste. Which has gained me about two-square feet of reclaimed former bramble ground. She said the job would probably take her longer than she originally thought.

It should be an interesting summer.

Garden design ideas welcome ...